Guest Post: Pushing Back

6 days ago with 1 comment
My friend Daniel Quinan made an excellent observation on my recent post about coming out, the people who advise against it, and the reasons they give for their advice. I thought it was worth sharing here (with his permission). I’m not exactly sure how to put this into words (although I’ll give it a shot)… but I think there’s an even deeper-level critique of Fr. ...
Constipation Theory

Constipation Theory

7 days ago with 7 comments
When Father T used to discourage me from coming out, he used to say that he didn’t want me to be “pigeonholed” — by which I think he meant that, once people knew I was attracted to men, they’d just think of me as That Gay Guy, and the Gay part would get in the way of them knowing me. But of course what really got in the way of people knowing me was the fact that I had to ...
Extraction

Extraction

2 weeks ago with 6 comments
I’ve been flat on my back for a couple of days with the flu. I think I’m almost better, but it’s been a rough couple of days, mentally and physically. Isolation has never been good for me, and last night I hit a kind of crescendo of mental anguish as I was trying to fall asleep. There’s a great episode in Season 3 of The Magicians where Quentin comes face to face with a doppelgänger of ...
Conversation 4: Metanoia

Conversation 4: Metanoia

9 month ago with 56 comments
So you were at this Fourth of July thing… So I was at this Fourth of July thing. Sometimes at these family things I can forget myself and just play with the kids, just be joyful with them, be everybody’s fun uncle. This wasn’t one of those times. By the time the fireworks were done, I was deep down in this hole of self-pity. Not a good scene. So while I was driving home, I ...
Conversation 3: Be Fruitful

Conversation 3: Be Fruitful

9 month ago with 9 comments
  So how did this all start? The dating, the break with celibacy, the return to celibacy, and whatever weird in-between, back-and-forth thing you’re doing now. It was July 4th, 2016. Independence Day. So dramatic. I know. I don’t do these things on purpose. You one hundred percent do. Shut up. I didn’t this time. Anyway I was at my sister’s house for one of our ...
Conversation 2: This Body of Death

Conversation 2: This Body of Death

9 month ago with 10 comments
All right, I’m back. Good. The last things you said were not exactly reassuring. I’m even more worried now. Oh, the stuff about St. John of the Cross being homoerotic? That. Are you doing the queer revisionism thing? Where it turns out everyone was gay? St. Joan of Arc, Cardinal Newman, David and Jonathan, Jesus and John? Nope. Was just telling a story. But do you think there are ...
Conversation 1: Wheat and Tares

Conversation 1: Wheat and Tares

9 month ago with 4 comments
Where have you been? Busy. I’m working full time while studying part time to get my Master’s in social work. I was a little worried. About what? Well, you posted that thing about being in relationship. And you’ve been sounding fairly liberal in general. Then that poem about your lover, or something? Oh. Well, I’m not in a romantic relationship at the moment, if that helps. ...
PASSAGE

PASSAGE

10 month ago with 2 comments
my lover’s face disturbs the light his cheek is dark his eyes are bright outside, a sparrow leaves the tree his passage casts a shade on me so all things pass from place to place and, passing, cast a shaft of grace that serves to make their passing good; thus all of space is understood.   Photo by Alex Iby on Unsplash
Nuke the Gay Whales

Nuke the Gay Whales

1 year ago with 18 comments
When I was about ten, some of my conservative Catholic pals and I had a joke where we would say “nuke the gay whales”. I don’t remember where we heard it, but I remember laughing. The point of the joke was to spit in the eye of The Liberals, because even at that age, I knew that The Liberals hated nukes, loved gays, and cared about whales. It’s weird that it never ...
Bypass

Bypass

2 years ago with 33 comments
We were at the karaoke bar. My other friends stepped outside for a smoke, and it was just me and E. in the booth. It wasn’t Easter yet, so she was still waiting to become Catholic. She still had lots of questions. She didn’t understand every last bit of it, she said, but she knew about the Eucharist. Hoping I wasn’t causing scandal, I told her that the Eucharist was the only ...