Conversation 4: Metanoia

Conversation 4: Metanoia

3 month ago with 52 comments in Uncategorized
So you were at this Fourth of July thing… So I was at this Fourth of July thing. Sometimes at these family things I can forget myself and just play with the kids, just be joyful with them, be everybody’s fun uncle. This wasn’t one of those times. By the time the fireworks were done, I was deep down in this hole of self-pity. Not a good scene. So while I was driving home, I ...
Conversation 3: Be Fruitful

Conversation 3: Be Fruitful

3 month ago with 9 comments in Uncategorized
  So how did this all start? The dating, the break with celibacy, the return to celibacy, and whatever weird in-between, back-and-forth thing you’re doing now. It was July 4th, 2016. Independence Day. So dramatic. I know. I don’t do these things on purpose. You one hundred percent do. Shut up. I didn’t this time. Anyway I was at my sister’s house for one of our ...
Conversation 2: This Body of Death

Conversation 2: This Body of Death

3 month ago with 10 comments in Uncategorized
All right, I’m back. Good. The last things you said were not exactly reassuring. I’m even more worried now. Oh, the stuff about St. John of the Cross being homoerotic? That. Are you doing the queer revisionism thing? Where it turns out everyone was gay? St. Joan of Arc, Cardinal Newman, David and Jonathan, Jesus and John? Nope. Was just telling a story. But do you think there are ...
Conversation 1: Wheat and Tares

Conversation 1: Wheat and Tares

3 month ago with 4 comments in Uncategorized
Where have you been? Busy. I’m working full time while studying part time to get my Master’s in social work. I was a little worried. About what? Well, you posted that thing about being in relationship. And you’ve been sounding fairly liberal in general. Then that poem about your lover, or something? Oh. Well, I’m not in a romantic relationship at the moment, if that helps. ...
PASSAGE

PASSAGE

4 month ago with 2 comments in Uncategorized
my lover’s face disturbs the light his cheek is dark his eyes are bright outside, a sparrow leaves the tree his passage casts a shade on me so all things pass from place to place and, passing, cast a shaft of grace that serves to make their passing good; thus all of space is understood.   Photo by Alex Iby on Unsplash
Nuke the Gay Whales

Nuke the Gay Whales

11 month ago with 18 comments in Uncategorized
When I was about ten, some of my conservative Catholic pals and I had a joke where we would say “nuke the gay whales”. I don’t remember where we heard it, but I remember laughing. The point of the joke was to spit in the eye of The Liberals, because even at that age, I knew that The Liberals hated nukes, loved gays, and cared about whales. It’s weird that it never ...
Bypass

Bypass

1 year ago with 33 comments in Uncategorized
We were at the karaoke bar. My other friends stepped outside for a smoke, and it was just me and E. in the booth. It wasn’t Easter yet, so she was still waiting to become Catholic. She still had lots of questions. She didn’t understand every last bit of it, she said, but she knew about the Eucharist. Hoping I wasn’t causing scandal, I told her that the Eucharist was the only ...
Decay

Decay

2 years ago with 10 comments in Uncategorized
The sanctuary lamp is burning danger-red. The host is sealed away like radium in lead. Behind the golden doors your glowing heart decays, emitting bits of love as burning alpha rays. I’d climb inside that tomb, I’d cook in your desire, my atoms all deranged, my organs all on fire.
Parable

Parable

2 years ago with 12 comments in Uncategorized
So I’m sitting at St. Clement’s trying to get a good cry in before I start the day. Like you do. It’s an odd hour, so there are only three or four people there. Most of us are scattered, but one, an old African man, is kneeling front and center, in the middle of the aisle, orans position and everything. I already like this guy. He reminds of another old African man — ...
Hang Together

Hang Together

2 years ago with 71 comments in Uncategorized
Somebody asked me the other day why Adoration is the one thing I can hold on to. Context for the question: I’m a hot mess. Without going into specifics, celibacy1 has not been exactly my forte lately. There was a guy,2 and now there isn’t. And although in some ways it ended extremely well, and although a decade and a half of now done darkness3 taught me how to keep a pretty even ...