My Cup Sort Of Dribbleth Over

5 years ago with 6 comments in Uncategorized
One of the things I hate most about depression is not knowing what it means. Of course, it doesn’t have to mean anything: I’ve been short on sleep, my back hurts most of the time, and that means I can’t exercise, either. That’s a recipe for feeling crummy. The problem with being melancholy and overanalytical, of course, is that you’ve always got to figure it out. ...

On Sheep’s Wings

5 years ago with 8 comments in Uncategorized
But you and all the kind of Christ Are ignorant and brave, And you have wars you hardly win And souls you hardly save… Night shall be thrice night over you, And heaven an iron cope. Do you have joy without a cause, Yea, faith without a hope?1 “Faith without a hope.” Ugh. Sometimes that’s exactly what’s necessary. Whenever the liar’s lies start sounding ...

Rob Gordon vs. Joan of Arc

5 years ago with 8 comments in Uncategorized
“Part of chastity is not being too attached.” That was Father T during our most recently bi-weekly (supposedly) phone call. “Supposedly” because, as with the doctor, I usually wait until things are pretty bad until I give him a call. And, as with the doctor, if I just talked to him regularly then things probably wouldn’t get so bad. But I’m a man and men ...

Not That There’s Anything Wrong With That

5 years ago with no comments in Uncategorized
“I’m attracted to men too,” said Fr. S. in the confessional when I told him about my problem. He wasn’t fooling me. He’s not the kind of man you would even wonder about. Not that men with SSA are never virile; I’m plenty virile. (And if you disagree I’ll punch you in the head.) But he was clearly making some kind of Point. “If I see a man ...

Deep Dark Secrets, and Other Irrelevancies

5 years ago with 14 comments in Uncategorized
I just dropped Sal off at the bus station. He’s moving on up north, to see his cousin and maybe get his old job back. My heart aches to see him go, and I know the apartment will be lonelier for a while, but it was time, and it was one heck of a visit. We didn’t do much while he was here. Watched a bunch of movies, drank a bunch of beer. Went to adoration, went to Mass, hung out ...