This Is My Body

This Is My Body

1 month ago with 4 comments
My mother’s mind is nearly gone. That is the phrase people use to talk about her condition. What does it mean? Her mind must be somewhere. She is alive; her soul hasn’t left her body. But her brain is so damaged by Alzheimer’s that it can no longer serve as an interface between mind and body. The author of Meditations on the Tarot says that a miracle, or an act of magic–he uses the ...
Who He Really Was

Who He Really Was

3 month ago with 3 comments
You could write a pretty good novel about this. “In the middle of a global pandemic, a man in his late thirties receives news that his father has died and named him executor of the will. He leaves the city for his rural childhood home, to sort through his father’s enormous collection of hoarded books, receipts, photographs, and music. As he works, the house becomes a physical metaphor for his ...

Breathing Space

11 month ago with 4 comments
Did I tell y’all I’m working on my Master’s in Social Work? I’m about to enter my third and last year. This summer I took an elective in Group Therapy. The final paper was a proposal to create a group for a population I felt was under-served. Obviously I wrote about Queer Christians. The idea is for people to have an alternative to Dignity (“Catholic teaching is ...
Convertigo: The Long & Winding Road

Convertigo: The Long & Winding Road

12 month ago with 2 comments
Here it is! I spend an hour talking with Bryce Taylor of Convertigo. It’s a winding road. We start with my parents’ journey from non-observant Judaism to Buddhism to Evangelicalism to Catholicism and almost to Eastern Orthodoxy. I skipped the part where they joined a cult, because you just can’t cover everything in an hour. I did namecheck Baba Ram Dass, but I mistakenly ...

Convertigo: Coming Soon

12 month ago with 3 comments
I spent a solid hour yesterday talking with Bryce Taylor of Convertigo, a podcast on Christian converts & ecumenism. We covered a lot of ground… What my family’s Jewish roots mean to me Growing up gay & scared & sad & isolated Coming out of the closet Plunging into the ex-gay world and then fleeing it Finding beauty & solace in the Byzantine rite …and, ...
Mariposa

Mariposa

1 year ago with 3 comments
Some Christian men and women believe that, when they insist that “men should be men” or that “America has become feminized”, they are defending Christian values. Didn’t St. Paul say that “the effeminate” will not inherit the Kingdom of God? On the contrary: the word St. Paul uses refers to strength of character, not to mannerisms. Its translation as ...

Guest Post: Pushing Back

1 year ago with 1 comment
My friend Daniel Quinan made an excellent observation on my recent post about coming out, the people who advise against it, and the reasons they give for their advice. I thought it was worth sharing here (with his permission). I’m not exactly sure how to put this into words (although I’ll give it a shot)… but I think there’s an even deeper-level critique of Fr. ...
Constipation Theory

Constipation Theory

1 year ago with 9 comments
When Father T used to discourage me from coming out, he used to say that he didn’t want me to be “pigeonholed” — by which I think he meant that, once people knew I was attracted to men, they’d just think of me as That Gay Guy, and the Gay part would get in the way of them knowing me. But of course what really got in the way of people knowing me was the fact that I had to ...
Extraction

Extraction

2 years ago with 9 comments
I’ve been flat on my back for a couple of days with the flu. I think I’m almost better, but it’s been a rough couple of days, mentally and physically. Isolation has never been good for me, and last night I hit a kind of crescendo of mental anguish as I was trying to fall asleep. There’s a great episode in Season 3 of The Magicians where Quentin comes face to face with a doppelgänger of ...
Conversation 4: Metanoia

Conversation 4: Metanoia

2 years ago with 57 comments
So you were at this Fourth of July thing… So I was at this Fourth of July thing. Sometimes at these family things I can forget myself and just play with the kids, just be joyful with them, be everybody’s fun uncle. This wasn’t one of those times. By the time the fireworks were done, I was deep down in this hole of self-pity. Not a good scene. So while I was driving home, I ...